Thursday, July 21, 2016

'My Husband Explains What Makeup Is' Tag!


This is my son, not my husband. Just so we're clear. LOL.

I first saw this intriguing tag on Pastel Sparkles blog under The Boyfriend Explains What Makeup Is, and thought it would be fun to interrogate my husband and see if he has been paying attention to me over the years. I'm pretty sure he ignores me 99% of the time, but he may fluke some of these just using common sense, and because, well when you've been on Earth as long as he has, you're sure to pick up some general knowledge on things outside your field. Baha! Sorry hubby, just kidding!

Now my husband is extremely camera-shy (I get it, I dislike having my photo taken too) so I've posted a photo of me with our eight year old son instead. Keep in mind this is our son, not my husband! The story behind this photo? I'm glad you asked. Mr 8 painted his face with my makeup, then when he went off to play in another room, I thought 'why the hell not?' and joined in, replicating his design on my own front-head. Of course, Mr 8 freaked out when he saw my face and we both laughed hysterically, because TWINSIES! I'm such a fun Mum, you guys! So you can basically look at my face and our son's face and do some backwards science in your brain and guess what hubby's face looks like. Backwards science, yay!

So the idea is I name a bunch of different makeup items and he has to guess what it is and what it does. Here we go!

BB Cream: "Big Boob Cream? Makes your boobs bigger? I have no idea." {Baha! Clearly!}

Primer: "Makes me think of primer and paint, so it's an undercoat? Put it on under your makeup." {Lucky guess. Also, you've never painted anything in your life}

Foundation: "Levels out all the bumps and lumps to make everything smooth." {Not really? That would have been a good answer for Primer though!}

Concealer: "I don't know how all these layers manage to do something through each other? It sounds like it conceals stuff. Hides blemishes or skin discolourations". {Disco!}

Powder: "Oh, FFS. I know from the movies it hides shine. Evens the skin tone?" {*commences Spanish Inquisition in regards to what movies he's been watching*}

Brow Gel: "What?!" (Incredulous). "For an eyebrow but is it trying to make the brow bigger or smaller? What's the trend right now? Like hair gel, so it makes the hair sleek!" (proud of himself). {eyebrows usually come in pairs}

Eyeshadow: "For the eyelids, to colour them in!" {Haha, that's one way to put it}

Eyeliner: "For the bit where the eyelashes are, at the top and bottom. It's normally black. Makes your eyes look better!" {yes, yes and yes!}

Mascara: "For the eyelashes, makes them blacker and stand out more" {*starts to question husband's sexuality*}

Corrector: You put it on pimples and blemishes? This is hard. Blends the colour of your makeup out?" {False alarm. He's straight.}

Contour: "Fuck me! Haha. I'm guessing it's like a shading thing to add a different definition to your face so it looks like you have definition where you don't." {That was surprisingly accurate}

Blusher: "To redden your cheeks!" {pretty much, give or take!}

Bronzer: "To make it look like you have a tan" {again, pretty much!}

Baking: "WHAT?!?! This makes me think of baking powder in cooking, which lifts things, so maybe its for saggy bits of skin?" {I don't think so, but your guess is as good as mine on this one!}

Strobing: "To bring contrast to the colours on your face, where it transitions from a light to a dark shade." {I am pretty sure you're bullshitting, but that is kinda sorta accurate, to a degree. Sort of.}

Highlighter: "A very light shade to hide shadowy parts of your face? Or maybe it's a bright yellow you apply to parts of your face you want to remember for later!" {I love this answer! He's referring to highlighter textas! Bahaha!}

Setting Spray: "Put it over the top to make sure all the makeup stays in place and is impervious to water"{how scientific}

Lipliner: "Same as eyeliner but on your lips. It makes the edges a continuous line" {boys are funny}

To be fair, I didn't know what baking and strobing were and legitimately had to fire up the google machine for answers. I mean I've heard of them, but I feel like things got batshit crazy after the highlighting and contouring crazes and refused to read about baking and strobing out of principle. LOL. Thanks to my husband for playing along. He now knows much more about makeup than he ever needed and/or wanted to!

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I'm joining in with the Fabulous And Fun Life Monday Makeup Madness Linky!

If you've done this tag with your partner, please link it up in the comments! I'd love to have a read!

35 comments:

  1. Haha, boys are funny!! This is hilarious, I wonder what my fiance would answer to these questions?

    Kez | acaciasdreams.com

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  2. My husband travels for work overseas a lot! So he's pretty up with most make-up (given the lists and pictures I send with or text him lol)
    I'm sure he'd say something about a yellow texta if I asked him to explain highlighter.

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    1. Oh I've never thought to ask hubby to get me makeup when he goes away. I'm pretty sure he'd refuse to go into Mecca on his Sydney trips though! He even waits outside when we're together, lol. I love that you get makeup presents!

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  3. LOLZ that was hilarious! The BB cream answer...*insert crying laughter emoji*

    Gotta be honest - I have NFI what "baking" is. I do know what strobing is though.

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  4. Hehe! Your husband did get a lot of answers correct in wonderful laymen's language! I love his answer about 'colouring in' the eyelids! And what a typical male answer re the BB cream! Goes to show men do think about boobs a lot! Lol!

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    1. It was probably because he was sitting opposite me at the time. Haha! #theyarentsmall

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  5. LOL! Good one. Glad you confirmed that was your son, not your husband.

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  6. BIG BOOB CREAM XD hahah this was a funny read!

    Lily not Louise

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  7. *starts to question husband's sexuality* -> this killed me! hahaha

    Pam xo/ Pam Scalfi♥

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  8. I don't know if I'd get all the answers right. BB cream????

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    1. It's tricky as it can stand for different things, like beauty balm or blemish balm! I know what it does but it's not even clear what it stands for!

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  9. Haha love this - both your hubby's responses and your comments!

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  10. I love the idea of a neon highlighter to mark our face with. haha.

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  11. This is a fun post! I'll have to quiz my boyfriend now! lol

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, yeah it was fun to ask him everything. I love reading other people's answers in this tag!

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  12. I don't think I'd get most of these answers right, let alone my husband! Your hubby did good!

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  13. He did amazingly well! I have no clue what baking or strobing is. Love his answer for BB cream the best...haha!

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    1. Hehe I know! Some of what I ramble on about must have actually sunk in! :)

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  14. Someday there will be a heat treatment announced to bake the saggy bits of your skin and make them rise again. And then he will point back to this and say "HA, I was right!"

    I'm still giggling over what my guy thinks powder is... and his eyeliner advice.
    https://thatgeekygirlfriend.wordpress.com/2016/07/11/my-boyfriend-explains-makeup-tag/

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    1. Thanks for linking up Sarra, I'm off to read your guy's answers now! :)

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  15. LOL love it! At the start as I like oh no, this isn't going well, but then he surprised me with the second half of answers. Surprisingly accurate! I liked your commentary too lol

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  16. Gee these are pretty impressive answers Di - did you tell him he did really well? Truly I'm amazed - if I was quizzed about, say, car engine parts, I wouldn't have the faintest idea. You've trained him well lol - congrats! Terrific and fun read by the way xxx

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    1. I only just told him this morning, lol. He says he should test me with computer related questions (he's in IT/Systems Administrator) and see how I do. Haha! xxx

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  17. LOL these are pretty good answers! Trangles xoxo


    www.doaner-fide.com

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  18. This is absolutely hilarious. Kind of reminds of the time I interviewed hubby for the blog, following a dare from Kylie Purtell and my mother in law was staying with us at the time and also got involved.

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